Enhancing Lives & Transforming Leadership

This is the second part of a two-part posting taken from excerpts of my soon-to-be-published book, “Confessions of a Reformed Control Freak – The Top Ten Sins Most Managers Make & How to Avoid Them”. I wrote this book with the hope that first-time managers would gain some valuable insights into what it takes to be an effective manager managing in the 21st. Century. Daniel Goleman, in his ground breaking book, “Working with Emotional Intelligence” said it best:training and e“We are being judged by a new yardstick: Not just how smart we are, or by our training and expertise, but also by how well we handle ourselves and each other“. You aren’t born knowing how to manage people effectively. We all start out making certain assumptions based on our own perceptions of what a manager should be. But our perceptions can be wrong. I hope you are able to learn from my sins. And trust me – in my 40 + year career as an award winning entrepreneur and general manager for one of Canada’s best run and most profitable companies I’ve made my fair share.

Confession Six: “Park your ego at the door, it’s not about being right”. If you need to prove that you’re always right, and they’re wrong – then you need to pick a different career. You and I both know that there is more then one way to accomplish the same thing. The more you allow other people to be involved in the process the more likely they will “buy-in” to the end result. Remember – Together – Everyone – Accomplishes – More.

Confession Seven: “You can’t control everything all of the time”. You must give up control to get control. (Delegate, delegate, delegate) You can’t control everything all of the time because it’s bigger then you are. Your role as a manager is to give your people the tools they’ll need to be successful and then get out of their way and let them do it. You need to trust your people that they can do the job that you’ve hired them to do. Resist the urge to micro-manage.

Confession Eight: “You can’t demand respect. Respect is reciprocal”. If you study Maslow’s “Hierarchy of Needs” theory you’ll discover that one of the basic needs all humans have – is the need to be acknowledged – the need to be recognized. By treating people respectfully, you are saying you value them as a person. Remember, you get what you give. If you show respect – you’ll get respect in return. But, you have to give it first if you ever expect to get it back.

Confession Nine: “People hear what they see, not what you say”. Your people play follow-their-leader. You must lead by setting the right example. You communicate 97% of the time, not by what you say, but by how you go about it. People believe the non-verbal communication as being more accurate. Your thoughts and actions must appear as one – they must be congruent. Do and say what you mean.

Confession Ten: “There aren’t any negatives – everything is positive”. How you react to any given situation is a choice that only you get to make 100% of the time. Your attitude isn’t just something – it’s everything! Your staff will take their direction from you. You must react in a way that is going to get you what you want. A positive attitude is contagious.

About The Author: Brian Smith, professional speaker, corporate trainer and management consultant is considered by many to be a leading authority on soft-skills training and leadership development. To find out more about Brian and what he can do for you and your organization visit http://www.pldynamics.com. To receive a free poster of “Confessions of a Reformed Control Freak – The Top Ten Sins Most Managers Make & How to Avoid Them” send an email to bsmith@pldynamics.com – be sure to put “Poster” in the subject line. Remember – Training doesn’t have to be expensive to be good – it just has to be the right kind of training.

Yes I admit it. I was once a control freak. I was a Micro-Manager! “Confessions of a Reformed Control Freak – The Top Ten Sins Most Managers Make & How to Avoid Them” (The title of my soon to be published book) is the first of a two-part series designed to help managers gain some valuable insight into what it takes to be an effective 21st. Century Manager. You aren’t born knowing how to manage people. We all start out making certain assumptions based on our own perceptions. And we know our perceptions can be wrong. The truth is that if I knew then what I know now, there is no question I would have managed differently. I hope you will be able to learn from my sins. And trust me – in my 40+ year career as an award winning entrepreneur and general manager for one of Canada’s most successful and profitable companies I’ve committed my fair share.

Confession One: “There is no such thing as common sense”. Common sense is a learned behavior based on your own life experiences and shaped by the people you meet, the books you read and the things you see and do. If you haven’t been taught how to do a task properly then how are you ever supposed to know? People don’t learn it by osmoses. The only way to change a “Can’t” into a “Can” is to train the “T” away.

Confession Two: “You can’t motivate people” People can only motivate themselves based on their WIIFM’s (What’s in it for me) not yours. People need to be convinced that it’s worth the effort, then and only then, will people be motivated enough to help themselves. The secret to managing people is finding out what their WIIFM is. And once you know that – you can use that understanding to get them to do what you need done. (They get theirs – and you get yours. It’s a win-win situation)

Confession Three: “You ruin good people by promoting them.” We tend to promote our super stars based on their past performances. Not everyone has what it takes to be a good team leader, supervisor or manager. Promoting people into areas where their abilities and aptitudes are less suited for the job may render the individual ineffective. Success as a manager is based on your people skills not your technical ability. If you can’t teach someone what you know that you aren’t doing your job as a manager.

Confession Four: “You don’t have to know everything.” Albert Einstein said it best. “You don’t have to know everything – You just need to know where to go to look it up.” Admit when you don’t know something. Don’t manage by smoke and mirrors. Tell them you don’t know but assure them you’ll get back to them with the correct answer. (If they can’t trust what you say then they won’t trust you at all.) You don’t have to make up the answers as you go along.

Confessions Five: “You are not the most important person in the conversation” If you can’t deliver the message so it is received the way it was intended; then what ever you said means absolutely nothing. The essence of communication is the sharing of thoughts and ideas. If the receiver doesn’t “get it” then the sender is the one who really doesn’t “get it”. We tend to blame the other person for the breakdown in communication. Effective communication takes two.

(This is the first of a two-part series. I will post confessions six to ten next posting. To receive a free “Confessions Poster” showing all ten confessions send me an email to: bsmith@pldynamics.com – Be sure to write “Confessions Poster” in the subject line)