Stress « Enhancing Lives & Transforming Leadership

How much are you worth? I posted that question on my Facebook page as a challenge to the majority of women out there who don’t put themselves at the top of their to-do list. Are you worth blocking off one day a week for “Me” time? One day a week to do what ever you want to do for “You”? One day a week to do what ever you want to do for “You” without feeling guilty? Are you disciplined enough to say “No” to family and friends who want to rob you of “Your” time? Based on the responses I got the majority agreed that they aren’t spending enough time, if any, on themselves. That needs to change.

Worth Remembering … “Be selfish with your time. learn to say no to things you do not have an interest in. You are not serving anyone when you spread yourself too thin. Your first obligation should be to yourself. You cannot be any good to for someone else unless you are first good to yourself” – Larry Winget

If I asked you to write down the three most important things in your life – what would you write down? Chances are pretty good that you did not put yourself on that list. Why not? What are you currently doing to cope with the daily stressors in your life? Many doctors estimate that 70 to 80% of the patients they see are exhibiting negative health symptoms either brought on or significantly aggravated by stress. Nine out of ten headaches are due to tension-caused muscle contractions in the neck and shoulders that radiate to the head. Stress can cause forgetfulness, indecisiveness, and an inability to concentrate. Stress is a fact of life. We all have stress in our lives, specially in today’s fast paced, ever-changing world we live in.

Worth Remembering … “The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another” – William James

Stress is not always bad. Stress can be a very positive and motivating influence in our lives. A moderate amount of stress can help you to be more creative, energetic, focused and productive. If is only when stress increases beyond our ability to easily cope with it that we begin to feel the negative effects – both physical and emotional. To accomplish more with our lives and achieve a greater feeling of personal satisfaction, we must reduce or eliminate unproductive stressors when possible and improve our ability to cope with stressors we cannot eliminate. What is causing stress in your life? For those stressors you can change, the key is to develop a specific action plan for creating the change you want, then follow through with that plan. For those stressors you cannot change, the key is to change your response to those stressors. Blocking off one day a week for “Me” time is a good place to start.

Copyright (c) 2015. Brian Smith – Reformed Control Freak. Are you looking for a speaker or workshop facilitator who can deliver an informative and entertaining presentation on a variety of soft-skill topics? Give Brian a call. He will work with you one-on-one to insure your event is an overwhelming success. http://briansmithpld.com

The “S’ word is all around us. It seems at times that we can’t go a day without hearing about it – feeling it’s effects or getting caught up in it. It wasn’t as topical 20 years ago – yet it has always been there – it just seems now it’s on everyone’s mind. The “S” word – yes I’m talking about STRESS! It’s like that pesky neighbour next door who just won’t move away. You can’t eliminate all of the stressors that are creating stress in your life but you can learn how to deal with them.

Stress is not always a bad thing. A little bit of stress can be a very positive and motivating influence in our lives. Stress can help create a sense of urgency and force us to get off the couch. It is only when stress increases beyond our ability to easily cope with it that we begin to feel both the emotional and physical effects of it. (Headaches, inability to concentrate and a rise in our blood pressure) The negative effects of common stressors are cumulative. A series of very mild stress events can create an exceptionally high level of stress if not dealt with effectively. You can learn how to cope.

Three Methods for Coping with Stress

Your most critical stress issues are those you feel are high priority to change and you are able to change them. Your least critical stress issues are those with a low priority and are very difficult to change. Learn to change what you can, influence what you will and give up on those things that you cannot control. For those stressors you can change, the key is to develop a specific plan of action for creating the change you want, then follow through with that plan. (I know I make it sound simple but it really is that simple) For those stressors you cannot change, the key is to change your response to them. (Mind over matter. If you don’t mind then it doesn’t matter)

Eliminate the stressors or change your response to them

To accomplish more with our lives and achieve a greater feeling of satisfaction we must reduce or eliminate unproductive stressors in our lives where ever and when ever possible. and improve our ability to cope with those stressors that we cannot eliminate. (You don’t get to pick your relatives or immediate family but you can choose how much time you spend with them) Attitude – your attitude is 100% in your control. Only you get to decide how you want to react to any given set of circumstances. Only you get to decide when to take a few deep breaths to calm yourself, walk away or simply ignore it all together.

Use the coping resources available to you

There are a number of social services available to you to help you cope with those major life events like disease, divorce and even death. You don’t have to carry the load yourself. Reach out – it’s not a sign of weakness to ask for help – it’s a sign of strength. Hobbies are also a great way to de-stress at the end of the day. Exercising, eating right and sleeping right will also help reduce the ill-effect of stress in your life.

Develop new coping resources

You only know what you know. If what you are currently doing to cope isn’t working, then you need to discover a better way. Read a book, attend a workshop or better yet join a support group. The last thing you should do is sit at home alone with too much time on your hands. The last thing you should do is sit alone at home feeling sorry for yourself. Getting knocked down isn’t the issue, everyone gets knocked down. Not getting back up and doing something about it is. You can learn to deal with the “S” word. It’s 100% in your control. 🙂

Copyright (c) 2013. Brian Smith. Not to be reproduced without permission. Brian Smith is available for speaking engagements, one-on-one coaching sessions and workshops. Contact Brian directly at briansmithpld@gmail.com or visit his site http://briansmithpld.com