Nature vs. Nurture – Does it Really Matter?

You’ve heard it said thousands of times. It’s nature over nurture. But – after the final analysis – does it really matter? You may have been born a certain style – but I’m convinced you don’t have to end up that way. Dr. Phil suggests that your past behavior is a great predictor or indicator of your future behavior – which is true – unless – and it’s a big unless – you change the here and now. You can rewire your brain. You can learn to “behave” a different way.

Worth Remembering … “Whatever the circumstances of your life, the understanding of type can make your perceptions clearer, your judgement sounder, and your life closer to your heart’s desire” – Isabel Briggs Myers – MBTI

Are we creatures of habit? Do we get accustomed to doing things a certain way – natures way – and generally stick with what we know? However, if we discovered a different way of doing something and decided to change how we where doing it to get a different result – a better result – could we do it? The answer to both questions is yes. (It’s nature vs. nurture) The greatest discovery of human nature is that we have the ability to change. We have the ability to change the way we do things in order to get a different result.  We can develop new habits. (Just stop doing one thing – and start doing another – and if we do it often enough – it will become us)

Worth Remembering … “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to a better understanding of ourselves” – Carl Jung.

Understanding yourself well – and studying the behavior of others allows you to improve your performance in relationships, both at work and at home. Results of a study conducted by the HayGroup, a leading authority on emotional intelligence, revealed that sixty-seven per cent (67%) of the competencies needed to communicate and interact more effectively with others is emotionally based. You can learn to communicate better, listen more intently, be empathetic, patient, flexible and open-minded. You can learn to manage your time more effectively, to deal with difficult people and challenging situations better. You can become a different and better version of yourself.

Worth Remembering … “The more you keep doing what you’re doing – the more you’ll get of what you got. When you change the behavior – you change the result”

I know from my own experiences that changing habits is not easy to do. But you can do it – it just depends on how willing you are to change. The canned phrase “I can’t help it – this is just the way I am” no longer cuts it. You are the way you are because either you like being that way – or – you aren’t willing to change. (Which one is it?) The truth of the matter is that you aren’t willing to put in the time and effort that it will take to change. But if you are convinced that you need to change. That you need to learn how to get along with people, to become a better listener and communicator – to be more patient – to control your temper – then you will learn how. You will do what ever it takes and take as much time as it takes to develop better habits and get better results. Any time is a good time to start a new beginning. So why not now? Nature vs. Nurture doesn’t really matter because you are the boss of you.  🙂

Copyright (c) 2012. Brian Smith – May not be reproduced without written permission. – briansmithpld@gmail.com

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