Category Archives: Self-Help

Success Comes By Learning To Fail Magnificently 1

Leadership Development, Personal Development, Self-Help • Tags: , , , , , , , ,

FailingIf you are going to fail – you might as well fail magnificently. And if you aren’t failing chances are you aren’t trying hard enough. If you aren’t failing you are going through life by playing it way too safe. You are robbing yourself of your opportunity to grow. I don’t thing we start out intentionally to fail – but we shouldn’t let the fear of failing get in the way of us giving it a go. Failing is part of the learning process. It’s a way of figuring out what works – and more importantly – what doesn’t work.

“I have not failed 10,000 times – I have discovered 10,000 ways that do not work” – Thomas Edison. Imagine what life would have been like in Edison’s time if he had given up. I know for certain that if he had given up he would never have realized his full potential. Where would Micheal Jordan be today if he had given up on basketball after being cut from his high school basketball team? I’ve been knocked down so many times I’ve lost count. Getting knocked down has never been an issue for me. If I want it bad enough I will get back up – dust myself off – and press on – hopefully a little wiser and a little more informed.

How bad do you want it? Are you willing to get knocked down – look for the lessons – learn them – and then get back up and press on? The only person getting in your way – is you. Don’t let shoulda, coulda, woulda be part of your vocabulary. Don’t rob yourself of your opportunity to grow. What do you want? What has to happen for you to reach your goal? Success comes by learning to fail magnificently. Now put a game plan together and get busy. 🙂

Copyright (c) 2014. Brian Smith – Reformed Control Freak. Not to be reproduced without permission. Are you or someone you know looking for a speaker who can entertain and inform on a variety of soft-skills topics? Contact Brian today. He will work with you one-on-one to insure your event is an overwhelming success. Visit http://briansmithpld.com

The Secret to Success is Between Your Ears 1

Leadership Development, Personal Development, Planning, Self-Help, Soft-Skills Training • Tags: , , , , ,

secret 3Think it, act it and eventually you’ll become it. The secret to your success is between your ears. However, just thinking about success isn’t good enough. You actually have to go out and apply yourself. That’s the difference between successful people and the not so successful people. Successful people work at it. Successful people get up off the couch and get after it. Successful people hit the ground running.

What would you rather be doing with your life then what you are doing right now? I want you to think about that for a moment. What does the ideal career look like to you? If you wanted to start your own small business, what kind of business would it be? If you want to take on a leadership position in your organization, what role would that be? Life – your life – is a planned event – wishing hoping won’t make it so. Put a plan together and then work your plan.

Good habits = good results. We are adults and we can develop new habits. What new habits will you need to develop to open your own small business? What new habits will you need to learn to get promoted? I know it’s easier said then done – but it can be done. Do you need to learn how to be more patient, open-minded or a better communicator and listener? Will you need to be better at planning and managing your time more effectively?

When you change the habit – you change the result. All you need to do is just stop doing one thing and start doing another. And once you’ve done it often enough it will become you. You will have developed a new habit. Once you’ve made up your mind what it is you want, and how to go about getting it, eventually everything will fall into place.

Copyright (c) Brian Smith – Reformed Control Freak. Are you or someone you know looking for a keynote speaker, planning a lunch-n-learn or organizing an event? Brian can deliver an informative and entertaining presentation on a variety of soft-skills topics. Contact Brian today – He will work with you one-on-one to insure your event is a success. http://briansmithpld.com

Going Along to Get Along – The Art of Working With People You Don’t Like 1

Dealing with Difficult People, Leadership Development, Management, Networking, Personal Development, Personality Types, Self-Help, Soft-Skills Training • Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

grumpy ladyYou may not like some of the people you work with – but the truth is – you need to learn how to get along with them. Think of a job that you could do in your life time that didn’t involve working with people. You’d be hard pressed to come up with one.  Dealing with difficult people and challenging situations is a learned behavior. You just need to decide if it’s worth it. But trust me – If you are looking for a career in sales, owning and operating a business some day or managing and leading others then it’s not open for debate – the ability to get along with others is a must have.

Think of someone you are having difficulty connecting with. You don’t know why but there is something about them that drives you crazy. There is something about them that makes you want to pick up a heavy object and smack them across the side of the head. Before you do something that might get you arrested give this 3-step process a try. Remember – you don’t have to like them you just need to learn how to work with them. The 3 R’s will teach you how.

Rapport: Find out something about them that you could use to strike up a conversation. Do they have hobbies? Are they married? Do they have children or grand children? What do they like to do in their spare time? Do they like to hunt, fish, play golf or read books? You need to be able to carry on a conversation with them on a subject that they like. You need to get them talking. Idle chit-chat is important to establish rapport. And you need to establish rapport to move to the next level. You can’t develop a relationship with someone until you’ve established rapport first.

Relationship: Successful sales people understand the value of developing a relationship with their clients. People like to do business with and buy products or services from people they like. You need to develop a relationship with the people you work with and interact with. You need to develop a relationship with the people you’re going to manage or lead. No one wants to let a friend down. If they like you they will go to great lengths so they don’t disappoint you. You need to develop a relationship before you can move on to the final step – respect.

Respect: The final step in this 3-step process is respect. If you have established a rapport and developed a relationship with the people you work with and interact with, then chances are they will respect you for you. They may not like what you said or what you did but, they will respect you and will most likely forgive you. However, keep in mind that respect is reciprocal. You must give it to get it. You can’t demand it. People respect people that they have developed a relationship with.

Copyright (c) 2014. Brian Smith – Reformed Control Freak. Are you looking for a speaker who can deliver an entertaining and informative session on a variety of soft-skills topics including; communication, time management, coping with stress and dealing with difficult people and challenging situations better? Contact Brian today. He will work with you to insure your event is an overwhelming success. http://briansmithpld.com

BYOM – Bring Your Own Motivation 4

Leadership Development, Personal Development, Self-Help • Tags: , , , , , , ,

images (28)If you are waiting for someone else to jump-start your career, promote you because you’re a nice person or get your life back on track, you’re going to be waiting for a very long time. Everyone has a long list of things that they’d like to accomplish and making sure you’re happy isn’t one of them. Motivation is inside out – never outside in. No one can motivate you – but you. Until you take that first step and show some initiative, everything will remain the same. Nothing changes until you do. Others can help you by creating an environment that is conducive to getting you off your couch, but until you’re convinced it’s the right move to make – it’s a safe bet that you’re staying put.

If you aren’t happy doing what you’re doing, then what’s it going to take to get you doing what you’d rather be doing? What’s getting in your way? What needs to happen for your circumstances to change? Take a moment and write a list of all those things that are holding you back. (Lack of finances, no experience or credentials, etc.) Now for each item that you put down on that list, what do you have to do to change it? Take a part-time job to earn extra money? Go to night school to pump up your resume? Gain some valuable life experience and networking opportunities by volunteering for a worthy cause?

Stop complaining. Put a plan together and start working your plan. You’ll be amazed at how far you can go when you stop making excesses and start producing results. You’ll be amazed at how far you can go when you stop blaming others and start putting the blame squarely on your own shoulders where it belongs. If you don’t believe in yourself – then how to you expect others to believe in you? Repeat after me “Anytime is a good time to start a new beginning. So I might as well start now.” I have faith in you. You can do this.

Copyright (c) 2014. Brian Smith – Reformed Control Freak. Looking for a keynote speaker? Planning a lunch-n-learn or training session? Contact Brian today. He will customize and deliver a program that is right for you, your people and your organization. To find out more visit http://briansmithpld.com