Category Archives: Teacher

Have You Ever Wondered Why?

brian smith-pld, Dealing with Difficult People, Leadership Development, Personal Development, Personality Types, Reformed Control Freak, Self-Help, Teacher

images (2)I am the first one to admit that I’m not the smartest person in the room. I’m certainly not the brightest color in a box of crayons – but come on – give me a break. The fact of the matter is people do some pretty dumb stuff. Some people say you can’t fix stupid – and I’m starting to believe them. Stupidity, for the most part, is a choice. Some people choose to be dumb.

Have you ever wondered why people don’t wait to get on the elevator until you have gotten off? Have you ever been riding up or down the elevator, have it stop on your floor, and before you have a chance to get off – someone starts trying to get on? What were they thinking?

Have you ever wondered why people wait in the checkout lane, holding up everyone else in the lineup, until after the cashier has finished ringing in and bagging their items before they get out their wallet or purse to pay for their purchase? At what point did they realize they’d have to pay before leaving the store?  And worse yet – they start rummaging through their pockets or purse for the exact change. It’s like they are in their own little world – oblivious to everyone else. What were they thinking?

Have you ever wondered why some people wait until they get to the counter before deciding what they want to eat? Fast food restaurants put the menu in bright lights, with fancy pictures above the counter so you can decide your meal choice before it’s your turn to put in your order. They call it Fast Food for a reason.  Get with the program people. What were they thinking?

Have you ever wondered why some people haven’t figured out what the passing lane is all about? Have you ever been stuck behind someone going 102 miles an hour – trying to pass a truck doing 100? Worse yet is being stuck behind a truck trying to pass another truck and both are barely going the recommended speed.  If you are holding someone up behind you – then you are going too slow. Put it in gear and stay in the slow lane. That’s what the slow lane is for. What were they thinking?

To steal a line from Larry Winget – The Pitbull of Personal Development (R) – “People are idiots and I can prove it”. If you haven’t tuned into Larry I recommend you check him out. (www.larrywinget.com) – If you’re like me – you won’t be disappointed. Have you ever wondered why people do some dumb stuff? I’ve cited just four examples. Feel free to add yours to my list.

Copyright (c) 2017. Brian Smith-PLD. Are you looking for a Professional Speaker or Seminar Leader who can entertain and inform your audience on a variety of topics including team building and leadership development? Visit https://briansmithpld.com

How to Build a Relationship With Just About Anyone

brian smith-pld, Coaching, Customer Service, Dealing with Difficult People, Leadership Development, Management, Networking, Personal Development, Personal Values, Personality Types, Reformed Control Freak, Self-Help, Soft-Skills Training, Teacher, Uncategorized • Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Conflict Resolution 2Practice the 3 R’s – to establish trust and build relationships with the people you work with and interact with. Have you ever met someone for the very first time and thought, “Yuck – what a dink?”. (I don’t mean Double Income No Kids). There is just something about them that you don’t like. For what ever reason they rub you the wrong way. The truth of the matter is sometimes you have to work with – or interact with – people you don’t like. Even if you don’t like them – you still need to find a way to work with them. I have a solution for you. Think of someone who you work with that for what ever reason, you are having difficulty getting along with them. I want you to try this little experiment and see if it helps repair that relationship or a least make it bearable. I call it the 3 Rs to building relationships and establishing mutual trust with just about everyone and anyone.

Rapport: Start a conversation and find out something about them that you can talk about. What are their hobbies? Do they have children, play sports or read books? What do they love to do in their spare time? You can’t build a relationship with anyone that you haven’t established a rapport with first. Get them talking about themselves or what they love to do, and you are on your way to the next step. You are on your way to likeability.

Relationship: People like to hang around with, and interact with people they like. The more conversations you can have with that person or persons, the more likely it is that you are breaking down those barriers and are becoming more likable. Soft-skills – the ability to communicate and interact more effectively with others is a necessary skill in building relationships. Building a relationship is key to getting along with people – even the ones you don’t like.

Respect:  You don’t respect anyone you haven’t built a relationship with first. Out of a relationship comes mutual respect. You might not agree with everything they have said or done – but because you have built a relationship with them, you will respect the fact that they have a right to their own opinion and a right to live their lives as they see fit. We tend to agree to disagree with people we respect.

If you have navigated the three-step process successfully you will be able to establish trust in your relationship with the people you work with and interact with. You never trust anyone you don’t respect first. As friends, parents, managers, leaders, and coaches sometimes you need people to take a leap of faith. Sometimes you don’t have all the answers and need them to trust you. If you have established mutual respect in your relationships, then they will trust you. They will take that leap of faith knowing that you would never set them up for failure. They’ll know you have their best interest in mind.

Copyright (c) 2017. Not to be reproduced without permission. To find out more about Brian and what he can do for you and your organization visit https://briansmithpld.com

Delegation 101: Assume Nothing

Coaching, Leadership Development, Management, Mentorship, Personal Development, Self-Help, Teacher • Tags: , , , , , ,

DelegationRule number one when working with others is to assume nothing because it may make an ass out of u and me. But mostly me because I took you at your word, that you understood what needed to be done and how I wanted you to go about doing it. People aren’t born knowing what they need to know. Always keep in mind that if you haven’t taught someone the way you want it done – don’t assume they will know how.

Worth Remembering … In the digital age you need to make knowledge workers out of every employee possible. – Bill Gates 

You may not be able to delegate all the tasks that you do, but you should be able to delegate most of them. I know you can come up with a 1001 excuses why you shouldn’t delegate, but think of it this way. If you don’t delegate some of your tasks you are robbing someone of their opportunity to grow. Do you hire stupid people or do they just get stupid after working for you? Your role as a manager or business leader is to teach others what you know. Your role is not to create followers but to create other leaders. And you can’t do that if you aren’t delegating some of your tasks.

Worth Remembering ... You establish some objectives for them, provide some incentive, and try not to direct the detailed way in which they do their work. – David Packard

Here are 8 easy steps to delegating more effectively:

1 – Decide what you want to delegate: You need to be very clear on what task they are going to do and make sure you give them all the tools they’ll need to be able to perform that task.

2 – Decide who you are going to delegate to: Who is capable, and more importantly, who is willing to take on more responsibility?

3 – Create a “Teachable Moment”: Demonstrate the task – then have them perform the task while you observe – and once you think they can do the task satisfactorily – have them do it one more time for good measure.

4 – Ask questions to ensure that learning has taken place: You need to ask some good open-ended and closed questions to make sure they know what needs to be done. Be sure to give them the opportunity to ask questions too.

5 – Monitor their performance: Follow-up, follow-up, follow-up. Make it a point to check-in on the person shortly after leaving them on their own, just to make sure they are performing the task satisfactorily.

6 – Keep the lines of communication open: Let them know you are there to help – if and when – they want it. Resist the urge to micro-manage.

7 – Hold the person accountable for the results: Standards, like quality, are not open for debate. You must hold people accountable for the results and not accept anything that doesn’t meet your standard. If they think they can get away with less than satisfactory work – then they will.

8 – Praise performance: Recognize what has been accomplished and be quick to offer praise for a job done well.

It’s important that you show trust and confidence in your people. The best way to do that is to get out of their way and let them do it. Results are what’s important, not how they go about doing it. Allow them to put their own personal stamp on it.

Copyright 2016 (c) Brian Smith – Reformed Control Freak. Not to be reproduced without permission. To find out more about Brian and what he can do for you and your organization visit https://briansmithpld.com

Everyone You Meet is Somebody’s Somebody

Coaching, Enduring Principles, Ethics, Mentorship, Personal Development, Personal Values, Teacher • Tags: , , , ,

secret 5Every Friday night is date night with my 5-year-old grandchild. It’s our time to hang out and do what ever she wants to do. We usually start out at her favorite eatery and end up at the local toy store. I cherish the time we get to spend together. We where enjoying a fun moment when she playfully grabbed my hat and put it on. “Hey Poppa” she said – “I’m you and you are Mr. No Buddy”. It came as a shock to me because I’d never heard her say that before. I knew she was just repeating what she had heard at school. She didn’t realize how hurtful that saying can be.

Children are sponges. They soak up everything they see and hear. They are a reflection of the environment around them. Adults, especially parents, need to be mindful of the lessons they are teaching their children. Children aren’t born bullies. They learn that from others. Children aren’t born haters. They learn that from others. Children aren’t born racists. They learn that from others. You are the greatest influence in your child’s life. They take their lead from you.

What lessons are you teaching your child? Are you teaching them to be tolerant, compassionate and respectful of others?  Do they know what it means to be a good citizen, to be kind to others and lead by example? Do they know that everyone you meet is somebody’s somebody? You have a very important job to do. I hope you are up for the task. The next generation of parents are counting on you.

Copyright (c) 2015. Brian Smith – Reformed Control Freak. Not to be reproduced without permission.  Brian is available for key note speeches or conducting workshops on a variety of soft-skills topics. To find out more about Brian and what he can do for you and your organization visit http://briansmithpld.com