February 24, 2023

How To Get Along With People Even If You Don’t Like Them

brian smith-pld, Coaching, Dealing with Difficult People, Entrepreneurship, Leadership Development, Management, Management Training, Mentorship, Personal Development, Professional development, Reformed Control Freak, Self-Help, small business owner, Soft-Skills Training, Teacher, Uncategorized

Rarely can you accomplish all that you set out to do without help from someone else. You don’t have to like the people you work with, but you must learn how to get along with them. Daniel Goleman believes that soft skills – often called emotional intelligence – are a common core of personal and social abilities that have proven critical to people’s success.

Worth Remembering – “One of the most important things about being a good manager is to rule with a heart. You have to know the business, but you also have to know what is at the heart of the business, and that’s people.” – Oprah.

A better understanding of yourself and understanding others’ behaviours allows you to improve your performance in relationships at home and work. Your technical abilities alone no longer guarantee success in working with others. Results of a study conducted by the HayGroup, a leading authority on emotional intelligence, show that EQ (emotional intelligence) is twice as important for most jobs involving working with people than IQ. You don’t have to be the most intelligent person in the room to be the most effective. Sixty-seven percent of the competencies needed to work with others are emotionally based. You can learn to be more empathetic, open-minded, and flexible and communicate and interact more effectively with others.

Worth Remembering – “In organizations where people trust and believe in each other, they don’t get into regulating and coercing behaviours. They don’t need a policy for every mistake. People in trusting environments respond with enormous commitment and creativity.’ – Walter Wriston.

Establishing a relationship based on mutual respect and trust is a learned behaviour. It is a process that all humans go through when meeting someone for the very first time. We take direction and like to hang out with people we like. Trust and respect don’t come automatically. You must earn it one person at a time. You must learn to get along with people even if you don’t like them. Working with others is a team sport. Just like it takes a village to raise a child – it takes a team to manage and lead an organization.

Take the 3-R Challenge and learn how to get along with people even if you don’t like them.

Think of someone you are having difficulty working with. For whatever reason, you two are not getting along. It can be someone at work or in your social circles. Please take on this Challenge and turn that situation around. I want you to apply a 3-step process known as the 3-Rs. (Rapport, Relationship, Respect) I promise you will be amazed at how effective it is to establish those all-important relationships.

Step One: Establish Rapport. Find out something about them other than the work they do. Do they have hobbies? Are they married? Do they have children? What do they like to do in their spare time? The easiest way to establish rapport is to get them talking about themselves. Ask questions, and show interest in them. If you show interest in them – they will be interested in you.

Step Two: Develop a Relationship. You cannot develop a relationship with anyone unless you have established rapport first. The more you converse with them on subjects they are interested in – the more likely you are to develop a relationship with them. You are beginning to break down the barriers between you and them. You are starting to like each other or at least tolerate each other.

Step Three: Mutual Respect. You will not respect anyone until you first develop a relationship with them. Respect is reciprocal, but you have to give it before you get it back. The more you treat someone how you want to be treated, the more likely they will respond in kind. You get back what you send out.

Build Trust; You will never build trust with anyone you don’t respect first. If you establish mutual respect in your relationships with the other person, they will trust you. They may not always agree with you, and you may not always agree with them, but they will respect that you have a right to express your opinion.

Take the 3-R Challenge.

Take the 3-R Challenge and establish those all-important relationships. Contact me at – brian@briansmithpld.com and let me know how you made out. I am here to help you succeed. Remember – You don’t have to like them, but you do need to learn how to get along with them.

Copyright (c) 2023. Brian Smith – Power Link Dynamics. Not to be reproduced without permission. Are you looking for a corporate training provider, a keynote speaker for your next conference or planning an in-person or virtual workshop? Contact Brian – he will customize a program for you and your organization. To learn more about Brian and what he can do for you, visit https://briansmithpld.com – All four of Brian’s published books are available on Amazon – https://amazon.com/author/brsmith.

January 27, 2023

Forget X or Y Management Styles – Switch to Z ¹

brian smith-pld, Coaching, Entrepreneurship, Leadership Development, Management, Management Training, Mentorship, Personal Development, Professional development, Reformed Control Freak, Self-Help, Soft-Skills Training, Teacher, Uncategorized

Are you ready for the most significant workforce shift in over 100 years? For the first time in our lifetime, we have the potential to work with four different generations at the same time. Each generation – Boomers, Gen X, Millennials and Gen Z communicates, interacts with others, is motivated by different wants and needs and prefers to be managed differently. Forget X or Y management styles – switch to Z.

Worth Remembering – “People don’t leave jobs … they leave because of bad bosses and poor management who don’t appreciate their value.” – Tom Peters

Forget X or Y Management Styles

Theory X style of management, developed by Dr. Douglas McGregor, assumes that the average employee is inherently lazy, dislikes coming to work and avoids taking responsibility at all costs. They require constant, close supervision, and any system of rewards and punishment needs to be vigorously enforced to keep everyone in line.

On the other hand, the Theory Y management style is more of a decentralized participative style of management. It is built on the premise that workers enjoy coming to work and are self-motivated to accomplish tasks. They will accept responsibility and do not need supervisors or managers constantly looking over their shoulders to ensure the jobs get done. Workers are made to feel they are part of the solution – not the problem.

Worth Remembering – “Start with good people, lay out the rules, communicate with your employees, motivate and reward them and stay out of their way and let them do the job. If you do all those things effectively, you can’t miss.” – Lee Iacocca.

Switch to a Z Management Style

Gen Z will make up 27 percent of the workforce by 2025. Research is still ongoing, but we already know they are like no other generation that has come before them. Zeds are interested in working for an organization that allows for fun, friendships and life-enriching activities. To attract and retain Zeds, you must provide collaboration opportunities, lateral job movement, and multi-level participation in decision-making. You need to develop a management style more aligned with Edward Deming’s 14 points and remove barriers that rob employees of pride in workmanship. Managing and leading others must be more than just supervision and setting targets. It should include guiding and mentoring employees, so forget X or Y management styles – switch to Z.

Copyright (c) 2023. Brian Smith – Power Link Dynamics. Not to be reproduced without permission. To learn more about Brian and what he can do for you or your organization, visit https://briansmithpld.com – All four of Brian’s published books are available on Amazon – https://amazon.com/author/brsmith.

January 3, 2023

You Need To Be Dialled In To Be An Exceptional Manager Or Leader

You can’t motivate anyone to do anything they don’t want to unless they think they will get something they want in return. Motivation is inside out – never outside in. People do things for their own reason – not yours. Even those who volunteer their time and energy to causes are doing it because they are getting something out of it, or they wouldn’t keep volunteering. People only listen to the music they want to hear. Either WIIFM on the FM dial or MMFIAM on the AM dial. You need to be dialled in to be an exceptional manager or leader.

Worth Remembering – “Become the type of leader that people would follow voluntarily, even if you had no title or position.’ – Brian Tracy

Are you dialled in?

WIIFM – (Wants in it for me). Everyone can be motivated, but everyone is motivated to accomplish a goal or complete a task through different things. What motivates me – may not motivate you, and vice versa. The key to motivating someone is to find out what they want and then help them get theirs – then, more than likely, you’ll get yours. If you do this – you’ll get that. If you don’t do this, you won’t get that. The carrot approach is more effective than the stick.

MMFIAM – (Make me feel important and more). If you take the time to solicit others’ input when putting together your action plan to accomplish a goal or complete a task, they will get behind it because they feel they have been recognized as a contributing member of the team. They feel included – not excluded. They feel respected and appreciated. There are several ways to accomplish the same task or to reach your goal. It doesn’t have to be your way – make it the team’s way.

Worth Remembering – “A leader is like a shepherd. They stand behind their flock, letting the most nimble go out ahead, whereupon others follow, not realizing that all along they are being directed from behind.” – Nelson Mandela.

Henry Landsberger, a Sociology Professor at the University of North Carolina, coined the term ‘The Hawthorne Effect” – while analyzing the Hawthorne Studies conducted between 1924 and 1932 at the Hawthorne Works, a Western Electric Factory outside of Chicago. In this study, the lighting was intensified to examine its effect on worker productivity. Every time they adjusted the lights, productivity went up. Landsberger concluded that the increase in productivity had more to do with the interest management had shown in their workers. (MMFIAM). You need to be dialled in to be an exceptional manager or leader.

December 24, 2022

It’s Time Leaders Got FOCUSED On People

brian smith-pld, Coaching, Enduring Principles, Leadership Development, Management, Management Training, Mentorship, Personal Development, Personal Values, Professional development, Reformed Control Freak, Self-Help, small business owner, Soft-Skills Training, Teacher, Uncategorized

People like to work with and socialize with people they like. Building relationships at work is just as meaningful as building relationships with those you interact with outside of work. The newest generation to enter the workforce – Gen Z – prefers to work for an organization that allows fun, friendships and life-enriching activities. How much fun are you and your leadership team to be around?

Worth Remembering – “Good coaching is about leadership and instilling respect in your players. Dictators lead through fear – good coaches like good leaders don’t.” – Unknown

It’s time leaders got FOCUSED on People.

F – Friendly – Smile, say hello, and develop those all-important relationships. You need to expand your circle of influence. Lead by walking around and getting to know everyone on your team.

O – Organized – My Dad told me you’re late if you don’t show up 15 minutes before you said you would. You’re sending the wrong message if you don’t arrive on time – you’re telling everyone that your time is more valuable than theirs.

C – Courteous – Treat people respectfully, even if you don’t like them. It costs you nothing to be respectful of others. But it pays dividends.

U – Understanding – You need to see things from another person’s point of view. You only know what you know – and you can’t know everything. Be empathetic, open-minded and flexible.

S – Sincere – What you say and do must be congruent. If you genuinely want to build relationships with others, how you treat them will be evident.

E – Energized – Be passionate and enthusiastic about what you are doing and the direction the organization is headed.; others will want to follow.

D – Dependable – Whatever you say you will do – do it. People must be able to depend on you. Your word must be your bond. If others can’t trust your word – they won’t trust you.

Worth Remembering – “Show respect to others even when they don’t deserve it. Showing respect to others reflects your character – not theirs.” – Unknown.

People won’t care about you or your organization unless they know how much you care about them. People won’t respect you or your leadership team – unless they know you respect them. Respect is reciprocal – you have to give it to get it. You can’t demand respect – you must earn it.

Copyright (c) 2023. Brian Smith – Power Link Dynamics. Not to be reproduced without permission. To learn more about Brian and what he can do for you and your organization, visit: https://briansmithpld.com. All four of Brian’s books are available on Amazon in print and e-reader editions. https://amazon.com/author/brsmith