If Your Life Sucks It’s Because You Do

Loser 1If you aren’t happy doing with you’re doing, then you need to take a good look in the mirror and realize that the only one getting in your way is you. You need to learn to get out of your own way and live the life you intended. Don’t let shoulda, coulda, woulda be part of your vocabulary. What is getting in the way of you realizing your full potential and accomplishing your goals? I want you to take a moment and write them down. You can’t fix what you don’t acknowledge.

You are the steward of your life. You are responsible for your own happiness. No one can make you choose the life you lead. It’s a matter of choice – your choice. It is 100% in your control. You choose to be overweight. You choose to be poor. You choose to be miserable. You choose to blame others for your lot in life. When you get knocked down you choose to stay down.

You have the power within you to make a change. You just need to decide what it is you’d like to change for the better? When you change the habit you change the result. Can you create a new habit to get a different result? Replacing old habits with new ones is not easy but it can be done. Just stop doing one thing and start doing another – and if you do it often enough it will become you. You have the capacity within you to make a change. You can learn to act in a way that is going to get you what you want? You just have to decide when you’ve had enough of your old life. Until you get to that point you won’t be motivated enough to make a change. Motivation is inside out never outside in. If your life sucks, it’s because you do.

Copyright (c) 2016. Brian Smith – Reformed Control Freak. Not to be reproduced without permission.

Do You Know Your Why?

winningThe question to ask yourself isn’t what you do – the question to ask yourself is why you do it. Once you know your why, then all you need to do is have the courage to create your life around it. What really turns your crank? In a perfect world what would you really love to be doing? What would it take for you to develop a career around it? What things need to fall into place for you to live a purposeful life – a life of purpose?

#Worth Remembering … You were put on this earth to achieve your greatest self, to live out your purpose and do it courageously – Steve Maraboli

Not sure what you were meant to be – what you were meant to do? For the next two weeks I want you to write down what you are doing when you catch yourself smiling  for no particular reason. Every time you catch yourself smiling or whistling a song, write down what you where doing at that very moment. After your two weeks are up look over your list. Do you see a pattern? You should be able to connect the dots and see the common denominator. It will reveal what you are truly meant to be doing.

#Worth Remembering … The mystery of human existence lies in not just staying alive, but in finding something to live for – Fyodor Dostoyevsky

I truly love what I do. I can’t see myself doing anything else. You have within you the ability to do the same thing. You just need to decide what it is – and then put a plan together to get there. I know I make it sound simple – but it really is. All you need to do is to get out of your own way by believing you can live the life you are intended to live. Wake up every morning with your goal in mind. Do one thing, no matter how small, that is going to move you forward to your goal. Be patient – slow and steady eventually will win the race.

Copyright (c) 2016. Brian Smith – PLD. Not to be reproduced without permission https://briansmithpld.com

What Legacy Will You Leave Behind?

Optimistic 3My Mom had a great life – filled with much love – some sorrow – but mostly happiness. She was a devoted mother to her 7 children, 15 grand children and 11 great grand children. But most importantly she was best friend and loving wife to my Dad for over 66 years. She may have been small in stature, but don’t let her size fool you – she was one tough lady. She had to – to keep five boys in line. But she managed to do it in such a way that you always knew she loved you unconditionally, no matter how many times you messed up. And trust me – we messed up on more than a few occasions.

She was a member of the Canadian Women’s Army Corps and an outspoken advocate for the fair treatment of veterans. My Mom and her poppy blanket where a big hit on National TV. She managed to get a front row seat on Remembrance Day in the Nations Capital, where she laid a wreath in my Dad’s honor. A memory our family will cherish forever.

Those who knew my Mom knew she never shied away from giving her opinion on a variety of topics. A trait that she passed on to her children. You always knew where you stood with her. She was a serial volunteer, serving on a number of committees in one capacity or another. Mom was a proud member of the Royal Canadian Legion, the Red Hat Society and a Lady of the Knight. An honor bestowed upon her because my Dad was a Forth Degree Knights of Columbus.

Mom had a great sense of humor and loved to socialize with her many friends. Where ever, and when ever you saw my Mom you knew my Dad wouldn’t be too far behind – they were inseparable. They are now where they were always meant to be – together. “When you look to the heavens perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where are loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy” – author unknown but rather fitting. My parent’s spirit will live on through us and our children’s children. They will always be our guiding light and soft place to fall.

My parents taught us to be respectful towards others. To say please and thank you and pardon me – old fashion values that should never go out of style. They taught us to stand up for ourselves and each other. That family is important. They reminded us that nothing worthwhile comes without a great deal of hard work and sacrifice; and if it was worth doing – it was worth doing well. They reminded us that if you weren’t willing to go all in – then don’t waste your time and energy. What life lessons will you pass on? What legacy will you leave behind?

Copyright (c) 2015. Brian Smith – Reformed Control Freak. Looking for a keynote speaking who can entertain and inform on a variety of soft-skills topics? Visit http://briansmithpld.com to find out more.

Everyone You Meet is Somebody’s Somebody

secret 5Every Friday night is date night with my 5-year-old grandchild. It’s our time to hang out and do what ever she wants to do. We usually start out at her favorite eatery and end up at the local toy store. I cherish the time we get to spend together. We where enjoying a fun moment when she playfully grabbed my hat and put it on. “Hey Poppa” she said – “I’m you and you are Mr. No Buddy”. It came as a shock to me because I’d never heard her say that before. I knew she was just repeating what she had heard at school. She didn’t realize how hurtful that saying can be.

Children are sponges. They soak up everything they see and hear. They are a reflection of the environment around them. Adults, especially parents, need to be mindful of the lessons they are teaching their children. Children aren’t born bullies. They learn that from others. Children aren’t born haters. They learn that from others. Children aren’t born racists. They learn that from others. You are the greatest influence in your child’s life. They take their lead from you.

What lessons are you teaching your child? Are you teaching them to be tolerant, compassionate and respectful of others?  Do they know what it means to be a good citizen, to be kind to others and lead by example? Do they know that everyone you meet is somebody’s somebody? You have a very important job to do. I hope you are up for the task. The next generation of parents are counting on you.

Copyright (c) 2015. Brian Smith – Reformed Control Freak. Not to be reproduced without permission.  Brian is available for key note speeches or conducting workshops on a variety of soft-skills topics. To find out more about Brian and what he can do for you and your organization visit http://briansmithpld.com