Have you ever met someone for the very first time and thought “what a dink”? And I don’t mean Double Income No Kids. There was just something about them that you didn’t like. I thought that when I first met Morris – Laura’s cat. As a kid growing up I never hung around with cats. We were dog people. All of my friends were dog people. So I never had much use for cats. We all have built-in biases based on our own experiences. We are influenced by what we read, hear and see. So it’s no wonder I never got to know cats. After taking the time to get to know someone have you ever changed your opinion about them? Meeting and getting to know Morris helped me change my opinion about cats.
Worth Remembering … There are things known and there are things unknown. And in between are the doors of perception. – Aldous Huxley.
Perception is your reality. It is whatever you think it is. What you know won’t hurt you. However, the elephant in the room are the things you don’t know. Don’t let your preconceived notions get in the way of the decisions you make. Don’t believe everything you think. Question the status quo. Continue to seek out others who have a different point of view. Empathy, trying to see things from someone else’s point of view will never go out of style. Ask the right questions and really listen to the answers before you act. Have you ever made a decision only to find out that you didn’t have all the facts? Had you had all the facts, you would have made a different decision.
Worth Remembering … One of the biggest problems with the world today is that we have large groups of people who will accept whatever they hear on the grapevine, just because it suits their worldview – not because it is actually true or because they have evidence to support it. – Neil deGrasse Tyson
I’m a huge fan of the hit musical TV show “The Voice”. I think there is a lesson here that you could use the next time you hire or promote someone. They pick singers from a blind audition. They don’t pick a singer based on their perception of what they think a singer should look like, they pick a singer based on the quality of their voice. The next time you need to hire or promote someone, hire or promote them based on their qualifications not by the colour of their skin or gender. We like what we like and we are more than likely to hire or promote someone who has the same qualities as the kind of person we like. But we know from experience that they don’t always turn out to be the right person for the job we hired them for. The next time you have to make a decision don’t believe everything you think.
Copyright (c) 2018. Brian Smith-PLD. Not to be reproduced without permission. Are you looking for a keynote speaker or seminar leader who can deliver an informative and entertaining session on a variety of soft skills topics? Give Brian a call. You won’t be disappointed. To find out more about Brian visit https://briansmithpld.com
Trust and respect do not come automatically just because you’ve been given a title or own the business. You must earn both – one person at a time. Establishing trust with the people you work with and interact with is a 3-step process that you must go through when meeting someone for the very first time. Some will go through this process easier than others, while others will have to work at it. Why establish trust? Because sometimes you need others to take you at your word. They will be more inclined to do that if they trust you. They will trust you if they believe that you have their best interest in mind. Walter Winston may have given us the best reason why establishing trust is so important when he said – “In organizations where people trust and believe in each other, they don’t get into regulating and coercing behaviours. They don’t need a policy for every mistake … people in these trusting environments respond with enormous commitment and creativity”.
Have you ever licked a 9-volt battery? (I’m not suggesting that you do – I’m just asking if you have). When adults do something that makes them feel good – that gets them excited – what are they more apt to do? If you licked a 9-volt battery and you liked that sensation – then more than likely you’d lick it again. I believe the key to motivating someone is to figure out what turns their crank – figure out what they are looking to get out of the deal. People do things for their own reason – not yours. All you have to do is figure out what’s in it for them and use that to get them to do what you need to get done.
Yes, I admit it. I was once a control freak! I was an “old school” micro-manager. Trust me – in my 40+ year career as an award-winning entrepreneur and general manager for a major corporation, I’ve made my fair share of mistakes. I’m here to confess my number one sin in the hope that first-time supervisors, managers and business leaders will learn what not to do. I also think there’s a lesson here for seasoned veterans who developed their management style in the late 1960’s like I did. Social psychologist Douglas McGregor referred to it as a “Theory X” style of management. Managers who adopted this style believed that workers were inherently lazy and needed to be bullied or brow-beaten into performing their work. Employees were never to question authority. “Do as I say – not as I do. When I tell you to jump – the only thing you can ask is how high”. There are still a number of managers and business leaders out there who continue to manage and lead that way. They manage and lead by intimidation. I’m here to tell you the days of the “Bully Boss” are over.
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