Category Archives: Leadership Development

Have You Ever Wondered Why?

brian smith-pld, Dealing with Difficult People, Leadership Development, Personal Development, Personality Types, Reformed Control Freak, Self-Help, Teacher

images (2)I am the first one to admit that I’m not the smartest person in the room. I’m certainly not the brightest color in a box of crayons – but come on – give me a break. The fact of the matter is people do some pretty dumb stuff. Some people say you can’t fix stupid – and I’m starting to believe them. Stupidity, for the most part, is a choice. Some people choose to be dumb.

Have you ever wondered why people don’t wait to get on the elevator until you have gotten off? Have you ever been riding up or down the elevator, have it stop on your floor, and before you have a chance to get off – someone starts trying to get on? What were they thinking?

Have you ever wondered why people wait in the checkout lane, holding up everyone else in the lineup, until after the cashier has finished ringing in and bagging their items before they get out their wallet or purse to pay for their purchase? At what point did they realize they’d have to pay before leaving the store?  And worse yet – they start rummaging through their pockets or purse for the exact change. It’s like they are in their own little world – oblivious to everyone else. What were they thinking?

Have you ever wondered why some people wait until they get to the counter before deciding what they want to eat? Fast food restaurants put the menu in bright lights, with fancy pictures above the counter so you can decide your meal choice before it’s your turn to put in your order. They call it Fast Food for a reason.  Get with the program people. What were they thinking?

Have you ever wondered why some people haven’t figured out what the passing lane is all about? Have you ever been stuck behind someone going 102 miles an hour – trying to pass a truck doing 100? Worse yet is being stuck behind a truck trying to pass another truck and both are barely going the recommended speed.  If you are holding someone up behind you – then you are going too slow. Put it in gear and stay in the slow lane. That’s what the slow lane is for. What were they thinking?

To steal a line from Larry Winget – The Pitbull of Personal Development (R) – “People are idiots and I can prove it”. If you haven’t tuned into Larry I recommend you check him out. (www.larrywinget.com) – If you’re like me – you won’t be disappointed. Have you ever wondered why people do some dumb stuff? I’ve cited just four examples. Feel free to add yours to my list.

Copyright (c) 2017. Brian Smith-PLD. Are you looking for a Professional Speaker or Seminar Leader who can entertain and inform your audience on a variety of topics including team building and leadership development? Visit https://briansmithpld.com

How to Build a Relationship With Just About Anyone

brian smith-pld, Coaching, Customer Service, Dealing with Difficult People, Leadership Development, Management, Networking, Personal Development, Personal Values, Personality Types, Reformed Control Freak, Self-Help, Soft-Skills Training, Teacher, Uncategorized • Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Conflict Resolution 2Practice the 3 R’s – to establish trust and build relationships with the people you work with and interact with. Have you ever met someone for the very first time and thought, “Yuck – what a dink?”. (I don’t mean Double Income No Kids). There is just something about them that you don’t like. For what ever reason they rub you the wrong way. The truth of the matter is sometimes you have to work with – or interact with – people you don’t like. Even if you don’t like them – you still need to find a way to work with them. I have a solution for you. Think of someone who you work with that for what ever reason, you are having difficulty getting along with them. I want you to try this little experiment and see if it helps repair that relationship or a least make it bearable. I call it the 3 Rs to building relationships and establishing mutual trust with just about everyone and anyone.

Rapport: Start a conversation and find out something about them that you can talk about. What are their hobbies? Do they have children, play sports or read books? What do they love to do in their spare time? You can’t build a relationship with anyone that you haven’t established a rapport with first. Get them talking about themselves or what they love to do, and you are on your way to the next step. You are on your way to likeability.

Relationship: People like to hang around with, and interact with people they like. The more conversations you can have with that person or persons, the more likely it is that you are breaking down those barriers and are becoming more likable. Soft-skills – the ability to communicate and interact more effectively with others is a necessary skill in building relationships. Building a relationship is key to getting along with people – even the ones you don’t like.

Respect:  You don’t respect anyone you haven’t built a relationship with first. Out of a relationship comes mutual respect. You might not agree with everything they have said or done – but because you have built a relationship with them, you will respect the fact that they have a right to their own opinion and a right to live their lives as they see fit. We tend to agree to disagree with people we respect.

If you have navigated the three-step process successfully you will be able to establish trust in your relationship with the people you work with and interact with. You never trust anyone you don’t respect first. As friends, parents, managers, leaders, and coaches sometimes you need people to take a leap of faith. Sometimes you don’t have all the answers and need them to trust you. If you have established mutual respect in your relationships, then they will trust you. They will take that leap of faith knowing that you would never set them up for failure. They’ll know you have their best interest in mind.

Copyright (c) 2017. Not to be reproduced without permission. To find out more about Brian and what he can do for you and your organization visit https://briansmithpld.com

Suck It Up Butter Cup and Keep Moving Forward

Leadership Development, Personal Development, Planning, Self-Help • Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Loser 1Nothing ever goes exactly the way it’s planned, so get over it. It’s called life – and life is full of surprises. This thing we call life is a work in progress. There will always be mountains to climb, valleys to trudge through and a number of detours to navigate around along the way. You can’t change what was – so there’s no sense wasting your valuable time or energy in trying to do something that can’t be done. If you aren’t happy with the hand you’ve been dealt , then it’s time to suck it up butter cup and keep moving forward. You don’t have to be held hostage by your past if you cut the chains that are you holding you back and chart a new course.

#Worth Remembering … Challenges are what make life interesting and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful. – Joshua J. Marine

The only person getting in your way, of you truly being happy and leading the kind of life you envisioned for yourself – is you. Once you decide to make a change in your life, you’re already half way there. Once you decide you want more out of life – you will find a way. You already have what it takes to be the champion of your life. Motivation is inside out – never outside in. You don’t need any other stimulus to help you accomplish your goals. All you need is to believe in yourself, that you are capable of doing what ever you set out to do. All you have to do is believe.

#Worth Remembering … Don’t let the concept of change scare you as much as the prospect of remaining unhappy. – Timber Hawkeye

Take a moment and write down three (3) things you’d like to change. Three things that you believe would make you truly happy. Take a look at the three things you’ve written down and decide which one is most important to you. Which one will give you the most satisfaction? I want you to write it out in big bold letters and post it on your bathroom mirror. I want you to read it out loud every morning while you are getting ready to take on the day. Do something every day, no matter how small, that will help you reach that goal. You will stumble – everyone does. You will get down on yourself because things aren’t moving as quickly as you hoped. That’s life’s way of testing you, to make sure it’s what you really want to do. Hang in there. Be patient and just keep plodding along. You will eventually make the kinds of changes necessary to live the life you envisioned for yourself.

Copyright (c) 2016. Brian Smith – #Reformed Control Freak. To find out more about Brian and what he can do for you and your organization visit https://briansmithpld.com

Do You Have What It Takes?

Competitive Advantage, Leadership Development, Management, Personal Development, Personality Types, Self-Help • Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

entrepreneurshipAre you thinking of taking the big plunge and going into business for yourself? Do you think you have what it takes to be a successful entrepreneur? I was recently contacted by a first year business student who had to go out and interview three entrepreneurs as part of a class assignment. He had to ask them three questions. If you are looking to go into business for yourself I thought you might be interested in my answers. I have had the good fortune of being self-employed since 1998. Starting and running your own small business is not for the faint of heart. Matter of fact – in a recent Industry Canada study conducted by Eileen Fisher, Schulich School of Business, York University and Rebecca Reuber, Rothman School of Management, University of Toronto, concluded that thirty percent of all new small businesses won’t survive longer than two years, and only half make it to year five. Some of the reasons for those failures are out of your control, but most are because of the bad decisions you will make. Lack of management or financial skills are in the top five.

Here are my answers to his three questions. I hope it will give you some valuable insight into what it will take to be a successful entrepreneur.

1 – What made you decide to own your own small business? I had managed other people’s businesses for a number of years, with the idea that I wanted to own and operate my own small business some day. Being my own boss appealed to me. It proved to be a great training ground for me. I got to learn what to do, and more importantly, what not to do. The best part was I got to make those mistakes on someone else’s dime. I recommend that to anyone looking to start their own small business. Work for someone else until you’ve learned enough to start your own.

2 – What are five key characteristics that you feel are important to have to be a successful entrepreneur? I believe there are a number of key characteristics you need to be successful. Some you will do well, others you will need to learn. Here are my top five. I’ve listed them here in no particular order.

  • Time Management: Be able to manage your time well. Learn to prioritize what needs to be done so that you do the most important things first. Sometimes that will mean doing things you don’t like to do. We tend to spend our time on things that we enjoy doing or that we are good at. Be disciplined enough to complete your “A” item before you work on your “B” or “C”.
  • Open Mindedness: You only know what you know – you don’t know what you don’t know – and it’s what you don’t know that could hurt you. Don’t be afraid to ask for advice – and be smart enough to take it. That’s how we learn.
  • Empathetic: Be able to see things from another person’s point of view. People make mistakes. The important thing is how you react to them.
  • Communicate: You must be able to communicate in a way that others will understand. If you can’t communicate both by the written word and verbally, then you stand little chance of being understood.
  • Goal Setting: Being successful is a planned event. Put a plan together to accomplish your goals. Great plans start with the end in mind. Have a clear vision of what you want to achieve and then put a plan together to get there. However, you need to be flexible enough to change or adjust your plan, if it isn’t going to help you achieve your goal.

3 –  If you could start your business over again, what one thing would you do differently? That’s a tough question because struggles are part of the learning process. If you aren’t making mistakes you aren’t learning anything new. There are some valuable lessons to be learned from the mistakes you make. The one thing I would do over again is to be more disciplined in managing the money side of the business. That old saying “it takes money to make money” is true. But you have to make the money before you spend the money. I would put together a realistic budget and then stick to it. Projections are just that – projections. They are a best guess. However, projections don’t pay the bills or more importantly, they don’t pay you.

Copyright 2016 (c) Brian Smith – Reformed Control Freak. Not to be reproduced without permission. Brian is a former Professor at Algonquin College’s School of Business, Top 100 Leadership Expert, Author and Speaker. To find out more about Brian and what you can do for you and your organization visit https://briansmithpld.com