Category Archives: Mentorship

Avoidance Is Not Conflict Resolution

brian smith-pld, Coaching, Dealing with Difficult People, Entrepreneurship, Leadership Development, management, Mentorship, Personal Development, Professional development, Reformed Control Freak, Self-Help, Teacher, Uncategorized

You can’t ignore a conflict in hopes that it will go away. Avoidance is not conflict resolution. Conflict and disagreements are unavoidable. Whenever you have more than one person in the room you’re going to have some type of conflict or disagreement. Two people can’t be expected to agree on everything. When dealt with in a respectful and positive way, conflict provides an opportunity for both parties to grow.

Worth Remembering … “Problem solving is a having the ability to directly and positively face and resolve difficult situations.”

If you are going to resolve it, you must first understand what caused it. Was it competitive feelings, personal jealousy or resentment, the desire to sabotage someone else’s idea, dissension caused by poor listening skills, lack of good communication skills or a lack of trust? Remember – avoidance is not conflict resolution. It is not going to go away by walking away. You need to deal with it.

Here are five things you can do to resolve conflict.

1 – Provide more information to make discussions productive rather than contentious. Lack of information or not the right information could be the reason behind the conflict.

2 – Ask for solutions. I would never let anyone come to me with a problem and not ask them what would they do to resolve it. If their solution sounds reasonable, and is doable, then go with it.

3 – Establish common goals, In the big scheme of things the differences may not be too far apart. You may discover you both want much of the same thing.

4 – Managing your emotions and keeping your ego in check is key to resolving conflict. Make saving the relationship your number one priority.

5 – Do not force a consensus. Develop a plan of action that is right for both parties. Something that you can both live with. Learn to pick your battles. Sometimes the conflict is not worth damaging or destroying a relationship.

Worth Remembering … ” An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind.” – Mahatma Gandhi

My final thought on resolving conflict. We are emotional beings, and sometimes we say things in the heat of the conflict that we wish we could take back. Words are powerful. They can leave an invisible scar. We can use them to build people up or tear them down. Choose your words wisely.

Copyright (c) 2020. Brian Smith – Power Link Dynamics. Not to be reproduced without permission. To find out more about Brian and what he can do for you and your organization visit: https://briansmithpld.com

Sometimes Good Enough is Good Enough

brian smith-pld, Coaching, Entrepreneurship, Leadership Development, management, Mentorship, Personal Development, Planning, Professional development, Reformed Control Freak, Self-Help

Sorry if I am the one to burst your bubble but nobody is perfect. Not even you. You do not need to handicap yourself by carrying around that kind of burden. Aim for the bull’s-eye? Absolutely. Strive for perfection? Yes – always – but understand that sometimes you cannot attain the unattainable. Sometimes you are going to fall short and miss the target. Do not beat yourself up over it. You can take pride in the fact that you did your very best. That you gave it your all. And if you truly gave it your all, then you have no more to give. You can only give 100%. Learn to accept that what is is, short comings and all. Eliminate the stressors in your life, chances are you will live longer.

Worth Remembering … “An environment that calls for perfection is not likely to be easy. But aiming for it is always good progress.” – Thomas Watson Jr.

According to most psychologists’ people move in the direction that is opposite to the direction they want to avoid. In other words, perfectionists strive for perfection because they do not feel that they are perfect. Because they somehow feel inferior to other people in certain situations and try to overcome their perceived short comings. In the long run, striving for perfection can destroy your self-confidence. In most cases perfection is highly overrated.

Worth Remembering … “Perfection is not attainable, but if we chase perfection, we can catch excellence.” Vince Lombardi

Paralysis by analysis. Over thinking can be a deal breaker. There is no such thing as the perfect plan. You cannot think of everything that could or would go wrong. If you wait for perfect before executing your plan, when early action would have been preferable, you stand the chance of missing your opportunity for success. In most cases perfection is highly over rated. Sometimes good enough is good enough.

Copyright (c) 2020. Brian Smith – Power Link Dynamics. Not to be reproduced without permission. To find out more about \Brian and what he can do for you and your organization visit: https://briansmithpld.com or contact him directly at: brian@briansmithpld.com

Why Women Should Rule The World

brian smith-pld, Coaching, Leadership Development, management, Mentorship, Personal Development, Reformed Control Freak, Self-Help, Soft-Skills Training, Teacher, Uncategorized

Why Women make better leaders can be summed up in just one word – “Empathy”. Empathy, the ability to be able to see a situation from another persons point of view. Women seem to be come by it naturally, while most men have to work at developing it. If there ever was a time for true leadership, it’s now. Dee Dee Myers, author of “Why Women Should Rule The World” believes that women are more successful running businesses because women can make people accountable for their actions, but they are also there to support them.

Women around the world are rewriting history. It’s easy to argue that men haven’t been doing such a great job lately. That’s not meant to be a political statement, I’m just stating the facts. Anna Crowe, CEO and Founder of Crowe PR believes that most women have a strong understanding of what drives and motivates people to perform at their personal best, and how to acknowledge different people for their performance.

“Many women, especially moms, are trained caretakers and know how to deal with crisis situations at home with compassion and patience. These attributes become very relevant when a women leader is dealing with crises situations whether this is related to HR or Clients.” – Huma Gruaz

Putting gender aside. Do you have what it takes to be a world class leader?

  • True leaders understand themselves and how their attitude affects others.
  • True leaders understand that they must communicate in a way that others will understand.
  • True leaders understand that every situation is different, so they know they must behave and respond differently. One leadership style does not fit all.
  • True leaders realize that they need their people more than their people need them. They understand that success is a team effort.
  • True leaders know they don’t have to have all the answers, so they need to surround themselves with people who do.
  • True leaders above all, understand that they must lead by example.
  • True Leaders park their ego at the door and do what they need to do to complete the task and to reach the goal.
  • True leaders understand that it doesn’t have to be just their way.

“Women make great leaders because we are flexible and agile. We can see the direction we thought we should take and we regroup and change course for the better. ” – Danita Harris

I could go on, but I think you get my point. Women deserve far more credit then they have been given. Gender shouldn’t be a factor in whether a person has what it takes to be a true leader. True leaders must master the ability to connect with others and build collaborative teams. True leaders must master the ability to communicate in a way that others will understand. True leaders must master the ability to teach others what they need to know and delegate successfully. If you’re looking to develop 21st Century leadership skills, then take a page out of their play book. You’ll be better for it and so will the people you lead.

Copyright (c) 2020. Brian Smith. Power Link Dynamics. To find out more about Brian and what he can do for you and your organization visit: https://briansmithpld.com or email: brian@briansmithpld.com

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You Always Have a Choice

brian smith-pld, Coaching, Coping with Stress, Enduring Principles, Leadership Development, management, Mentorship, Personal Development, Personal Values, Personality Types, Reformed Control Freak, Self-Help, Teacher, Uncategorized

Attitude – your attitude is 100% in your control. It’s a choice that you and only you get to make 100% of the time. Only you get to decide how you are going to react in any given situation. Only you get to decide when you’ve had enough. Only you get to decide if you don’t have the strength to carry on – to start again on a new path or stay the course. The only difference between those who succeed and those who don’t are in the choices they make. You are the boss of you.

Worth Remembering … “I have not failed 10,000 times. I have discovered 10,000 ways that do not work”. – Thomas A. Edison

I love playing golf. There is just something about it that appeals to me. I think it’s the ultimate game of risk and reward. I can either go for the green in two by taking it over the water and missing the sand trap or bail and take the safer shot by avoiding the water and reaching the green in three. I’m a high handicaper. I know if I don’t take chances and stretch myself I’m never going to improve my score. In a lot of ways golf imitates life. You can either play it safe or take a chance and go for the green in two.

Worth Remembering … “If you want it – go for it. Don’t always play it safe or you’ll die wondering”. – Unknown

If you aren’t taking chances and making mistakes then you aren’t growing. Growth happens outside of your comfort zone. We are the result of our choices, nothing happens by chance. Wishing and hoping won’t make it so. If you aren’t happy with where you are then you need to make a choice. In the words of Larry Winget – “Shut up, stop whining and get a life. Your success is your own dam fault”.

Don’t despair. All is not lost. You always have a choice. Take a chance and go for the green.

Copyright (c) 2020. Brian Smith – Power Link Dynamics. To find out more about Brian and what he can do for you and your organization visit his site: https://briansmithpld.com or send an email: brian@briansmithpld.com